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| Q: | Today my 21 year old son calls me and tells me very shy and sheepishly that he has been living with a 34 year old woman in a sexual relationship since January. She has a 10 year old son living there also. He intends to keep living with her. He was raised WELS and all his education in WELS schools. His two sisters and brother are either in the ministry or in WELS schools of ministry. He stated " marriage is over rated" and "no place in the Bible does it say you are to get married." I told him in strong terms that his behavior was willful sin and that it would not be accepted by me or especially by God. I told him in firm terms to move out immediately to save his soul and to rededicate himself to God. This is not a sin of weakness by him rather a willful sin he is well aware of and doesn't care. I have told him not to contact me until he has moved out of the situation. I will pray for him. I greatly urged him to contact a WELS pastor in his area immediately. I am heart broken. I feel I must practice "tough love." Should I have said or done more? Should I still say or do more? Should I contact his pastor? His dad is not in the picture. God help us all. | ||||||
| A: | Our hearts go out to you in your pain. You have taken an extreme step because of your son’s willful sin. This must be very hard on you. I do think you need to talk with his pastor. Because you are not talking with your son, someone should be talking with him about God’s Word. I can tell that you love your son. Consider writing him a letter expressing your love and the pain you are feeling at his willful sin. Urge him to repent and to return. Tell him you will welcome him back into your life when he repents. Let him know you still love him, but hate his sin. If there is another Christian family member who is geographically close to him, encourage that family member to talk with him regularly, encouraging him in a more gentle way to repent. I am not saying this to criticize your actions in anyway. I am encouraging you to find avenues for your son to continue to hear God’s Word. God’s Law will bring him to repentance. God’s Gospel will lead him to joy and peace. It will be important when this relationship falls apart that he knows your love and that he can return to seek your forgiveness. God’s blessings! | ||||||
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